amadelacasa

There are many ways for a man to control his woman. The best way to do it is to make sure she's dependent on you. Economically. As long as you've got a job you'll just tell her to stay home, that you don't want her to work, since that would be a disgrace to you. If you really want to make sure she doesn't leave the house while you're at work just make her pregnant. Since you're the head of the house and also the one with the sexual needs (women are just there to please the man, right?) you decide when it's time to make another baby. If your woman, by any chance, would tell you that she wants to leave the house (sometimes she actually needs to go out to the market to buy you food, or go to the doctor with one of your kids), make sure she tells you when she'll get back. And if she doesn't get back on time, or if you see her talking to another man in the streets, or if she doesn't serve you food on time, or if she doesn't get the baby to stop crying or, just imagine, if she doesn't want to please you sexually whenever you fell like it, you're allowed to punish her. And then you can go home to one of your lovers (who still thinks you're divorced, waiting your second baby) to get some affection and support.

This might sound like some kind of worst case scenario and I feel like the biggest hate-all-men-feminist ever (Pablo, I promise you, I'm NOT!). But without lying to you I can tell you that this is the case for a lot of women. In Sweden those cases exsist, I'm sure. In Guatemala those are not cases, it's culture. And with saying that I DON'T mean that all men are like that. I DON'T say that this is the Guatemalan culture. But I say that this is the culture of machismo. And unfortunately the machismo is everywhere here. About one woman dies every day in Guatemala because of violence within the family. (The whole female popuation is about 7 milions.) Every second day a girl dies of violence within the family or extended family. In 80% of the cases sexual violence is included, and in 20% of those cases the girls are younger than five years old...

Guatemala is far from just violence and controlling men. The Guatemalan culture is so much more than machismo. But the violence is a part of the reality here and machismo, as bad as it gets, still is a more or less accepted part of the society. There are wonderful, caring fathers and husbands, there are organisations fighting for the women's rights. There are laws about the women's rights as well, but there is no functioning judicial system making sure that those laws are followed. If you go to the police and tell them that your husband treats you bad, probably nothing would happen. And if it did, or if you as a woman decided to leave your husband, who would take care of you then? Who would pay for your kids food, shelter and education? Maybe it's easier after all, just to do as you are told, in that way you might not end up in trouble.